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Post by savysam on Jan 17, 2011 20:28:34 GMT -6
Hello...
If you have read anything about me from here or "the other place"  ...you will know I have 2 step daughters (7 year old twins).
I have been their other momma for the last 4 years now. I love them very much and am a very strong part of their lives now.
They do call me mom. (Yes their bio-mom knows this, no she doesnt love it).
Anyway, bio-mom is going through a bad time and it is putting my babies through hell. They have "moved" from her house and back 2 times in a week because of her BF problems. They have missed school and are having a hard time adjusting to all the craziness.
Please pray for their well being and that whatever decisions are made are the best ones for the kiddies.
Thanks for listening!!
I will move my "drama" over to the step parenting page after this...
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Post by Jennifer on Jan 17, 2011 20:38:22 GMT -6
Amy, I will be praying for your little step-daughters! it is so hard for the little ones to go through, so sorry!
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Post by tigress9136 on Jan 17, 2011 23:12:29 GMT -6
I am praying for your little ones.
Priscilla
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Post by tiffmw10 on Jan 19, 2011 0:43:24 GMT -6
That is so selfish of her. I'm so sorry they have to deal with such dysfunction from their BM. Praying. I have a stepdaughter and I need to post on the other thread as well.
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Post by momto2teenagers on Jan 19, 2011 9:25:53 GMT -6
Praying for them as well. My mom had problems and we moved like that all the time. She and my 1st step dad would fight and she would pack us up and we'd move then the next week we'd be back. It is very hard on kids to have to go through that.
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Post by hsmom24 on Jan 19, 2011 12:21:07 GMT -6
Definitely hoping and praying that she starts making decisions that are best, and healthy, for your kids. I can't even imagine how hard that is to see, and to feel powerless to help them.  |
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Post by savysam on Jan 22, 2011 13:41:58 GMT -6
It is very hard and has taken me a LONG time to realize, their lives are in GODs hands, not mine or hers.
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hardin82
Newbie
TTC after VR!!
Posts: 19
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Post by hardin82 on Jan 29, 2011 15:23:50 GMT -6
Will pray now...
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Post by shell2011 on Feb 2, 2011 10:17:57 GMT -6
Praying for your family. How are things going?
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Post by tiffmw10 on Feb 2, 2011 18:34:22 GMT -6
I was wondering if you had an update as well:-)
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Post by savysam on Feb 14, 2011 15:13:20 GMT -6
So sorry ladies, I have been "gone" for a couple of weeks. The power cord to our laptop broke and the new one just came in today through the mail. As soon as I let the dog out, I got on here to do my checking and updating for 2 weeks.
Update: bio-mom is back with her boyfriend for the moment. She has started working and they are left alone with boyfriend alot (this is what they are telling me and their father). Unfortunetly, we have no control what she does with them when they are in "her care". It is so hard to feel so out of control with this. They are the sweetest little girls and are hurting so much. One of the girls has been fighting with bio-mom for the last few weeks. (Bio-mom confides in me that daughter has an "attitude") The child has been drug through hell over the last month (and 4 years since the divorce) and it is starting to show! Her grades in school have dropped. She used to be a straight A student and now she is making F's and things (this just started this 9 weeks--halfway through the year). Dad and I have met with their teachers to keep them aprised of the situation...
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Post by savysam on Feb 14, 2011 15:16:38 GMT -6
I have created a "system" to encourage good grades. They can earn rewards (movie night (netflix), dinner date with a parent, buy a new book, movie theatre night with a parent, leapster games). Bio-mom only focuses on the negative and it seems like the one who fights with her so much is only getting negative attention. I am trying to make sure they get positive attention for the things they do well. Yes, I bribe and it seems to be working  |
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Post by kews on Feb 14, 2011 15:21:32 GMT -6
Amy, it is not bribery but positive reinforcement. Eventually the goal would be for those to be stretched out further. So sorry you are going through all that.
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Post by shell2011 on Feb 14, 2011 23:08:51 GMT -6
Amy, I'm sorry this is still going on. I like your system and agree with Kirsten that it is positive reinforcement, not bribery. I will keep praying.
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Post by ashrob on Feb 14, 2011 23:33:31 GMT -6
Amy, I have to "bribe" too to get DSD to do good in school. she also gets negative attention from bio mom. When you are in that position sometimes positive attention has to be what would be a bribe to other children, it is the only way to move things from as negative as they are to as positive as they need to be.
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...you will know I have 2 step daughters (7 year old twins).
